Life and Lessons

Marriage is a must for every individual for it teaches us a lot of things. Marriage demands a lot of virtues from both the partners to keep the relationship going. Not that all of us have the virtues required to make our marriages work. But the institution of marriage teaches us to acquire those virtues even if we do not have. When two people come together and choose to enter into holy matrimony, little do they realize the extent to which they will need to unlearn and learn to adjust, to give in, to give up and to expand one’s consciousness to include the wellbeing of the other individual. People think that marriage is all about getting love, getting companionship and enjoying life. The fact is that marriage means giving up one’s self and putting the other person’s interest ahead of our own. Perhaps god intended man to learn his lessons in life through marriage.

If one doesn’t want to make mistakes in marriage and learn fast enough to adjust and get on, it is better to listen to the advice from the senior citizens who have been married for decades. They would know all the tricks of the trade.

Every individual thinks of himself and his comfort. Especially men are more likely to be self centered and getting married gives them a chance to unlearn and relearn the lesson of putting other’s interest in front and learning to give rather than take. Women on the other hand are naturally givers. They tend to play the various roles of a wife, mother, daughter and other roles quite easily. All of the roles played by women demand that they give more than they take. So they are conditioned to give always without expectations.

Physical compatibility and relationship plays a very important role in a marriage. Physical intimacy is definitely very important in the early years of marriage. The early years are usually full of romance and sex. Over the years, the couple settle down to a comfortable companionship where sex does play a role but not a major role. There comes a time when each of the partner goes through menopausal period. Women as well as men undergo menopause. This period is definitely proves to be tough on the partners for they go through various psychological as well as physical changes. Women go through menopausal hot flushes, depression, anxiety and many other problems which lasts for several years. This is the time when women need all the understanding and support from their men to go through and manage this sensitive phase. Men on the other hand go through similar situation of depression, anxiety and impotence due to erectile dysfunction which may or may not be related to andropause. Erectile dysfunction causes distress in men as they begin to feel inadequate and become fearful of their inability to perform. The fear of failure and anxiety can further increase their problem of impotence. These times are definitely trying times for the marriage. Relationships that are established and rooted in companionship are likely to sail through and pass the exam successfully. Those relationships that have cracks in them are likely to breakdown. Therefore men need to worry not about their impotence but about the survival of their marriage. Every moment of life is about learning lessons.